Tuesday 13 March 2007

Ever need to go to the toilet in the bath?

Have you ever gotten into the bath and suddenly found you need the lavatory? Well I have and it seems to be a little joke that gets played on me from time to time by my comedy bladder. I don’t bathe often, let me clarify that, I mean I don’t use a bath a lot, I shower as much as the next man but when I do have a bath all the liquid in my body seems to want to leave.

My apartment doesn’t actually have the luxury of a shower, it has the head attachment connected to the taps but no fixture on the wall and anyway if I stood up in the kidney bowl shaped bath I’d bang my head on the ceiling!

You know the old joke about putting your pissed mates hand in a bowl of warm water and then standing back and watching as he pisses himself, well try it on a grander scale.

If you are lucky like me and have your toilet practically in the bath this is even easier. You just stand poised to get into the bath, put one foot in, wait a few seconds and voila, you suddenly need a whiz. I can do it projectile style without even taking my foot out of the bath! The liquid is happily deposited in the toilet and you are free to get on with your bath, cue applause.

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